Numerous times in my life, I have struggled with jealousy or envy. And I've found the very best antidote for envy is to call "it" what "it": is: sin. Yes, I said it.
Envy is sin.
FYI: I did the same thing with anger--no longer calling it a "bad habit" or an unfortunate but acceptable personality trait--calling it sin, made me hate it (and to see the destruction it caused).
Envy separates us from others and God.
Envy steals our joy.
Envy deceives us into feeling sorry for ourselves.
Envy causes us to detour from our path and wish we were on someone else's path.
Envy rationalizes or minimizes the need for us to make a change.
Consider, this week, any areas in which you envy others. Make a list. Then ask yourself how any of the above comments on envy can give you a new perspective on your life and situation. Ask God to forgive you and to renew your thinking.
Post whatever brave comments you have the courage to disclose:)!
Remember our call this week is on Saturday 8/27 am 9:30 am PST.
Be encouraged!
Becky
I tried to post this morning and lost the post but used the conclusion I came to in my day so maybe all is not lost. Last night when I asked myself what do I envy I could not think of anything. I was familiar with envy growing up everyone was prettier, smarter, richer, and more talented than I was. Envy robbed me of all the things that Becky said above. I didn't have a name for it and couldn't recognize envy when it crept into my life. I asked God to reveal any envy I had. He didn't waste any time. In my friends blog this morning she wrote about how proud she was of her daughter who is going back to Berkeley to finish her senior year. My son went to Kindergarden with her daughter and he is barely surviving at college. Oooh do I detect envy? Yes, because my first response was not joy for my friends daughter.
ReplyDeleteEnvy: separates us from God-don't want that to happen.
steals our joy: ouch!
sorry for ourself: thats a dead end.
detour from our God intended path: I have enough detours I want to be on God's Road
Envy minimizes our need for change: name it Envy = Sin
Forgive me Lord for envy please renew my thinking.
Sin takes you farther than you want to go and longer than you want to stay,
I WON'T ENVY!
Going over this Q3
ReplyDeletew1- The meaning of our words
I am making these statements personal
w2- Living a Quarterly Life
have lived a Quarterly Life without realizing that this is a great way to "number my days" Which I have started doing now. Thanks to Becky
W3- I WILL RESOLVE to
Decide to
A deliberate Choice
I heard on a TV program "Fake it until you make it" he was talking about Bulling in schools...but this applies to adults also.
W4- I WILL Find my hearts desire and write it down and re-write it until it becomes real.
I always have a hard time saying "its a god given desire....I will ask myself "What is a desire your have that keeps coming back." do you have the guts to try again and again until you have a success? I am stalled and have to admit it.
Why am I such a chicken? working on a REAL WILL statement and will post.
Won'ts
W5-Worry
Antidote is to PRAY
so PRAY!
W6-FEAR
Wow! I started a list of all I FEAR and thats a Bigey . I fear going to the grocery store alone. I fear making decisions on my own. I fail!
I fear being alone. I fear so much that it grips my heart and I can't stop it. The week that we were talking about FEAR. I WAS afraid at work.
just didn't want to lose my post. I called in today because of a migraine. Am feeling better now.
ReplyDeleteOk
W7- Wont GIVE UP
I fall in to this trap or way of thinking .
I said that I wanted to lose wt. and Eat right and do the 8 daily to does. Everyday. I give up about twice a week and lately got back to it.
I will report to you all about my progress.
oh. Just a little one of my things. I started a jar of Change. Its for each day I do "the does" I put a penny it it. Ok lets see how long that will last.
W8- I WONt envy.
Becky is direct on saying it as it is. SIN. I envy so much and didn't realize it. I envy others because they are thin and don't have to work and have money to spend. I envy others because they are liked and pretty. or have a fun job. or just a lot of things.
My ENVY List:
ReplyDeleteI wish: is also another name for ENVY
When I read what BECKY said:
Envy rationalizes or minimizes the need for us to make a change.
trying to think how to stop Envy?
1. look at it this way " there is no such thing as perfect people" (amy Grant song)
2. take responsibility for my wt. problem.
stop making excuses.
3. stop saying to myself "I oh, I am just un-likeable...thats why I am all ways in trouble at work or at home with my husband.
4. A new statement would be good. "I am liked at work and at home. I am loving and kind to all people that I come in contact with."
Hi all: I can definitely tell you what areas I do this in....mainly I tend to envy people who have steady income, who are either not having to work or pursuing careers they *want* to be involved in and who are involved in ministries they want to be involved in.
ReplyDeleteYears ago I was. I taught some new believers classes, and co-led small groups at my church.
Years later the church became rather political, not letting people do what they were called to do (in many instances).
So now, I guess you can add that I envy people who know what church God wants them in because I am still not sure where I fit.
The remedy of course, for all this, is letting God handle my daily marching orders (well, make that daily, weekly, monthly, yearly). I need to sit and wait on Him, which as we know, can be very hard to do.
Working on it.......praying on it.
Just got back at from my Mom's house (in another city) Oh, my Mickey, you are making such good progress. Bravo!!!!
ReplyDeleteLaura, isn't amazing when we see the envy it doesn't have the hold on us.
I am reading the book, Can You Drink the Cup? by Henri Nouwen
Pretty powerful stuff to have Joy and Sorrow in your life and see the sorrow as a blessing. Small book with great insights.
I think for me, with one child in college and the other in his senior year of high school, I am dealing with envy in relation to his classmates who are stellar students. The ones that have high test scores and are cum laude etc. and are applying to a variety of schools that are only possible with high scores.
ReplyDeleteAs with other envy in my life (esp after spending last week out in Aspen CO) I have to sit down with myself and start thanking God for all the little things and after a long session of thanksgiving, I feel so much better. I am so blessed, thank you Lord.
Oh, another envy that just came to mind: husbands of friends who are godly men - believers. What would that look like for my husband? I can't even imagine it, really, i can't. It would have to be the greatest miracle this side of Lazarus!
When others post their envies (or possible snarls) it helps all of us to see more clearly where we are all susceptible to the various envy. Carol, you are right when you practice thanksgiving it combats the destruction of envy.
ReplyDeleteI have caught myself saying I wish...... and realize that the wish for is actually a form of envy. Another tool to recognize the culprit. Hope your weekend is going well, I am serving waffles to a group of college students this morning.
EACH of you have made such brave and courageous statements! I commend you! Becky
ReplyDeleteHow glad I am to have had the opportunity to read everyone's comments this week. All of you have done some "soul-searching," and your posts have helped me be honest with myself and write openly about some areas of my life that I'm not at all proud of!
ReplyDeleteI hate to admit it, but this is an area that I have struggled with for much of my life. As an only child, I began comparing myself with others from a very early age. I envied those who were prettier or more athletic or able to tan effortlessly, while I just burned, peeled, and started all over again. As an adult, I have often found myself envying my friends with spouses and children, those with relatives living nearby, or those with large, modern houses with lots of space.
I could definitely relate to Becky’s comments yesterday about being a youth counselor and wanting the high schoolers to like her best. Now that I am older than most of the teachers in my school, when I see the students speaking of having crushes on their young teachers or wanting to hang out with them after school, I sometimes get twinges of envy and a little bit of sadness, too, for I remember the time when I enjoyed being only a few years older than my seniors and getting stopped in the hall by older teachers who had mistaken me for a student.
Although this is certainly not a weakness that I have overcome, this summer I began taking some steps in the right direction, I think, for each day I awoke with the attitude that “today is a gift; I must savor every moment of it, for the summer is short.” Nearly every day I spent some time outside, either working in my flower beds, feeding the birds, or just taking time to enjoy the blessings around me. Having come back home 15 years ago when my mom was dying of cancer, I not only live in an *old* house (built in the mid 1950s), but one that is forever needing something replaced or repaired. Instead of feeling envious of others or angry about the need for repairs, I enjoyed the sweet remembrances of summers in this very home that often came to mind, and I made time to visit some of my aging neighbors who played special roles in my growing up. As I began to think about going back to school, I promised myself that I would not let myself envy the young, carefree teachers, for I had already been down that road; now it is their time.
Becky is right. Envy does “detour us” and “steal our joy.” Rationalizing never gets us anywhere. However, “breathing in Holy Spirit, breathing out envy,” and embracing changes bring hope and renewal.
Wanda, well said.
ReplyDeleteyes! Wanda and Robbie
ReplyDeleteEnvy is such a easy detour to get sidetracked on. thanks for your faithful bloging
Just a quick comment:
ReplyDeleteCarol: I go to Church alone most of the time and do also fall into the (I wish) my husband would come with me just so I woundn't have to sit alone.
Just know I will pray from Him. He is on my list.
Laura: I like your ability to pinpoint your envy. I think its good to be aware of it. Good for all of us.
Count me in, I'm also alone in church.
ReplyDeleteReally praying lately about locking into a smaller church where maybe I can meet more ladies and develop more friendships.
Not sure if I am supposed to make a change, but He will show me.